The beginning of a new calendar year is a time when we all tend to reflect back on the past year. Things that happened, good and bad. Things we wanted to achieve and did. And the things we wanted to achieve and didn’t. Then we do it all over again in January. We set forth intentions (resolutions) and plans. Often, it’s the end goal we set without thinking about the journey to get there. The plan along the way. And it’s often because we don’t factor in the time and effort and energy it’s going to take to get to the end goal, that leads us to never fully follow through.
If your goal is to lose 25 pounds in 6 months, you’re going have to set forth small, manageable (key) ways to get there. Saying, I’m going to cut out all sugar and all starch and go to the gym for an hour every morning before work probably isn’t practical. Try breaking all of that down into smaller, more manageable bits. Take it two weeks at a time. So for the first two weeks, the goal is going to be to eat one less “serving” of sweets a day. If you eat a muffin or pancakes for breakfast…that’s essentially cake. You’re eating cake for breakfast. But it’s a blueberry muffin? It’s blueberry cake. And then you eat a cookie after lunch or grab a handful of candy off your co-workers desk and then nibble on chocolate while watching TV at night. Cut out one of those. Just one. For two weeks. And tell yourself you’re going to go to the gym one or two days a week for those two weeks. Every morning isn’t practical unless you’re already doing that.
The next two weeks, if you eat a starchy carb with every meal (and every snack), cut out one. Toast (or cake) for breakfast, a sandwich or a small pasta dish for lunch, pasta/rice/bread for dinner…cut out one. Make berries and yogurt your breakfast. Eat a soup and/or salad for lunch. Add an extra day at the gym. Or, find another way to incorporate more movement in your day. Taking the stairs is an easy one if you work in a high rise building. But I work on the 34th floor, I’m not walking up 34 flights of stairs. No, not at first you’re not. So get off the elevator on the 32nd floor, that’s two floors up you have to climb. You can do that. Or, start going to the bathroom on the floor above or below you. It will force you to walk up and down a flight a few times a day. You get the idea.
If your goal is to stop repeating the same cycle in your dating/love life (I keep meeting the same type of person, they only want one thing, it always starts out great but it moves too fast and then it ends and I’m hurt), set a standard. Set some boundaries. Know what you want and what you are willing to tolerate. Because what you allow (in the beginning, especially) is what will continue. You teach people how to treat you by what you will put up with and how you treat yourself. If a guy (it can go either way) asks you to come over to his apartment to watch movies and hang out and you don’t want that, don’t go. The amount of effort somebody is willing to put in usually shows you how much they value you or care. And “come over to my apartment so we can watch TV and just hang out” is essentially somebody putting in no effort. You don’t have to lecture or nag or beg. Just say, no thank you, that’s not what I’m looking for.
But if I say no, then I’ll just be alone? So be alone. You’re looking for an Audi R8, not a Ford Focus, right? So it may take a while before you come across one. If you want to settle for the Ford Focus, that’s fine. But don’t complain that it’s giving you problems at 50,000 miles. And let’s face it: If you don’t want to be alone with yourself, why would anybody else want to? Don’t settle for anything just to have something. Know what you want, know what you’re worth and don’t be afraid to wait for it.
If your goal is to save money by eating more meals at home and not going out so much (and maybe eating as a family, if you have kids), start with one night a week. Just one. There are seven days in a week, we all can find the time to cook a decent meal one of them. But I don’t know how to cook? If you know how to read, you know how to cook. And there are so many great recipes online. But we all have different schedules? Somebody is going to have to wait then. Or, maybe dinner will be a little earlier on Wednesdays (or whatever day you pick). It’s not the end of the world, it will just take a little adjusting. What if it doesn’t turn out good, what if nobody likes it? Then you try again the next week.
I want to be more charitable, I want to help make a difference but I have no idea where to start. Amazon has Amazon Smile (and you can do this if you have Prime as well). You pick a charity and Amazon automatically donates a few cents every time you buy something to your charity. You can change it whenever you want. You could do an animal charity for one month, then maybe a health related charity the next month then a disaster relief charity the next month, on and on. Or, just go through your calendar and pick a charity for every month. Say every month on the 15th, I’m going to donate $20 online to that charity. Or, $10. Or, $5. Whatever amount you choose. If you donate $5 a month for 12 months, that’s $60 a year. Almost everybody can sacrifice that.
People often want to focus on the sacrifice but not the reward. But I have to give up this, I have to no longer eat that, I have to wake up earlier and that’s not comfortable for me. You will have to sacrifice some things. But think about what you’re gaining along the way, because it isn’t just the end goal. It’s all the little steps and lessons and moments of triumph along the journey. Losing 25 pounds over night wouldn’t be nearly as rewarding as slowly seeing the numbers on the scale drop every week or so. Or, putting that dress on and realizing it fits now and it didn’t before. Those little moments along the way are what are exciting and what motivate us to keep going. Realizing at the end of a month how much extra money you have because you didn’t go out to eat as much. Also realizing you CAN cook and it’s actually relaxing and can even be fun. Or being proud of yourself for standing up for yourself and telling some guy (as good looking and funny and whatever as he may be) that you don’t want to go over to his place and whatever (something you’ll probably regret the next morning). You get to walk away with your head held high knowing you’re one step closer to finding what you DO want and not wasting your time with somebody who just wants to waste your time right back.
Astrologically, 2019 starts with eclipses. So the universe is giving us all that push to take away what doesn’t serve us. So now you can use that time/space/energy for what really does.
I’m not saying any of these things is easy, but they are worth it. So set your intentions for the next year and make a practical plan to follow through. Small steps you can take to get what you want. Accept that it’s going to feel a little uncomfortable. This fear of being uncomfortable is really a first world problem – people all over the world are uncomfortable all the time and often, they don’t have a choice. This discomfort won’t last forever. Push through it. And enjoy all those little moments of small accomplishment along the way. So when 2019 comes to an end and you look back, you’ll be proud of yourself for truly following through with what you intended. You’ll be 25 pounds lighter, have more money in the bank and have that Audi R8 (or, at least be closer to getting it).
Be open to what calls you…
OracleIndigo
