Month: November 2022

It’s easy to focus on the negative. On what you want that isn’t there. On something you’re waiting for that doesn’t seem like it will ever get to you. On things and people lost and gone.

The hard part is to refocus your attention on what is good. On the things around you now that make you happy. Things that you enjoy doing.

Worrying won’t make it happen any faster. All you’re doing is wasting energy and time. Refocus your attention to what is around you right now that brings you love and happiness. That’s a better way to spend your energy.

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The other day I was telling someone that I set a goal for myself for 2022 to read a book a month. And I’ve done it. And I’ve gotten used to it. And I intend to do it next year. And how happy I was that I found an online site that sells used books for $4-6.

This person, who probably hasn’t read an actual book in years (maybe decades) said, you can read books for free online.

I said, yes, I can, but that would mean sitting in front of a computer all day. And I like being able to hold a book in my hands and flip pages. And you can take a book with you anywhere – the beach, the train, the plane, a restaurant, your nightstand. It’s harder to do that with a laptop.

But the comment really made me…angry. Why would anybody have anything negative to say to someone who is trying to better their mind? To learn more? I can’t imagine saying anything other than, that’s great, good on you, getting caught up in a good story is amazing isn’t it, what types of books do you read, on and on.

The lesson: be careful who you share your goals with. Especially if it’s someone who doesn’t have similar goals. Or any goals at all. They’ll make you question your own or feel bad about what you’re trying to do.

And for anyone who wants to know, ThriftBooks is the online seller.

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Sometimes, having peace in your life or being at peace with yourself means making a very intentional decision. You have to actually choose peace.

This can mean that something will have to be let go. A way of thinking, a habit, a relationship…a person. If they aren’t bringing you peace…I hope they’re bringing you something else that’s positive and useful. Because without peace…what’s the point?

Making this choice will seem difficult in the beginning. People pleasers want to make sure everyone is happy and everyone else approves of their decisions. But once you realize and live with the priceless gift of peace…choosing it becomes easier.

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The last eclipse of 2022 is upon us today. It’s a full moon lunar eclipse in Taurus. Ruler of the second house of money and material goods, Taurus likes luxury and to be and feel comfortable. It can be what makes them appealing and also what holds them back in life. The idea of being uncomfortable is something they can’t tolerate. They’ll often stay in jobs and relationships and living situations they don’t like (and can openly admit they don’t like) but will also admit that it is comfortable. They can be stubborn to their own detriment. But also stable and responsible.

Full moons are times of completion. Endings and accomplishments. Not all endings are bad, either. But it can be a time when we get rid of things we don’t need in our lives. Things that aren’t helping us be a better version of ourselves. And if we don’t get rid of them, the universe will sometimes take them away for us. A way of clearing space for something better to take its place.

Eclipse energy is like new/full moon energy on steroids. So the changes can be significant and transformative. And they can feel fated. So the best we can do is flow with them. Always remember that we are where we are suppose to be. And we are going through what we’re going through because we’re supposed to. Even if it doesn’t feel like it or if we don’t like it.

I wish you all happy conclusions and endings and amazing brand new beginnings.

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A lot of people are stuck in their lives. Or in a specific area of their life. Their marriage or significant relationship. Their job. The relationship they have with family members. Where they live. Their weight. But in reality, significant change could be made if they would just start making different choices. If it sounds that simple, it is.

But it’s not necessarily easy.

You don’t need me to tell you that you can always get out of a marriage or end a relationship. Simple, yes. Easy, probably not. But that doesn’t mean it can’t be done. Or you shouldn’t consider it. I’m not pro divorce…but I am pro happiness and pro living the life you deserve. If you aren’t there with your current spouse or partner, it might be time to really think about making a different choice.

If you don’t like your job, you can always quit. Literally. If you are reading this at work, you can put your phone down and type out an email to your boss and start collecting your things and be done with it. I don’t necessarily advocate rash moves without thinking them through…but that doesn’t mean it can’t be done. If you are seriously unhappy where you work or doing what you do, it’s time to decide to do something else. Or to work somewhere else.

If you want to weigh less or want to weight more, you need to start making different choices and decisions with your food intake. And with your activity level. It doesn’t have to be epic. It can be eating one less “bad thing” a day. Or adding one protein shake a day. Or walking five or ten minutes outside every day. Keep it realistic and you’re more likely to stick with it.

Again, I’m not saying any of these things are easy. Making big changes usually aren’t. But they’re worth it if they make you happier. You just need to decide.

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We hold all sorts of institutions and businesses to a high standard. They better deliver this when they say they will or else I’ll….fill in the blank. We expect them to do what they say they are going to do. Deliver the product or perform the service like they advertise or claim.

But we usually don’t hold ourselves to the same standard. We tell ourselves we’re going to do something and then…don’t. And then don’t hold ourselves accountable. We just sorta forget we ever said we’d do it.

It’s time to start holding yourself accountable to yourself. It’s time for you to start delivering on what you said you were going to do. And if you don’t, you find a way to make it right. To fix it. Forgetting about it isn’t fixing it.

Depriving ourselves of a bad habit we engage in too often…that could be a way of holding ourselves accountable. Athletes and people who are physically active will often do this. No ice cream for me tonight. No cream in my coffee tomorrow morning because I didn’t do the reps I said I would. You get the idea.

This will also force you to be more mindful about what goals you set for yourself. Don’t set anything that’s too unattainable. You’re just setting yourself up to not accomplish it. Or to not even begin once you realize how big a goal it is.

But start holding yourself accountable.

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There’s a lot to be said about keeping your goals and dreams to yourself. About not sharing them with everybody. Because most often, it will be your family and friends who will try to talk you out of whatever it is you are thinking of doing or being. It’s a shame really. The people you would like to share with the most, will be the ones most likely to cut you down and make you rethink your dreams and goals and wishes.

But I encourage you, with the next dream or goal or vision you have for yourself, to just keep it to yourself. Work on it in silence. It’s not a community work project. It’s your goal or dream for yourself. You can explain it to people (if they even ask) when you’ve accomplished it.

Your dreams were given to you for a reason. They’re yours. Not your family’s or your friends. Protect them and keep them safe from criticism and negativity. Let your actions make the noise.

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It’s Pumpkin Spice season and this spice is all over the place right now. But you can use cinnamon year round to attract prosperity and to “speed things up” in your workings and in your daily practice.

You can stir it into your coffee or tea clockwise thinking (or speaking outloud) about what you want to bring into your life. You can stand outside your front door and blow it into the house asking for prosperity and wealth. Thursday is an ideal day to do this – the day ruled by Jupiter. The planet of expansion and growth and blessings. You can sprinkle it around a candle to speed up whatever working you are doing. Cinnamon, coffee grounds, red pepper, cayenne pepper…they can speed up manifestations.

So don’t stop using cinnamon after the holidays. Use it year round to encourage blessings.

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We all have parts of ourselves, aspects of our personality, that we don’t love. That we know need to be worked on, changed or just outright gotten rid of. Do you judge people too much or too often? Do you complain all the time? Are you overly-critical? Do you give up when things get difficult or challenging instead of seeing things through? Do you talk yourself out of things because you still hold on to outdated ideas of who you are and what you’re capable of? Do you give too much attention to what others think…or might think? Do you allow yourself to stay in situations you don’t like or that don’t make you happy because the idea of change terrifies you?

Sometimes, it’s seeing these traits in other people that makes us realize how unattractive they are. I am never as aware how draining and unattractive complaining is until I talk to my mom. I love her, but she has gotten used to complaining about everything. All the time. Nothing is ever good or fine or perfect. She’s not going to change and I don’t try to change her. She has to realize this is a quality of herself she doesn’t really like and change it herself. But I am suddenly made more aware of how I don’t want to be like that. And when I catch myself falling into that rut, I snap out of it. I start thinking of things in my life that I love, that I am happy for and about, things I’m grateful for.

This isn’t a “one and done” sort of activity. I have to remind myself repeatedly to do this. But it’s worth working on. Constant complaining really is unattractive and it doesn’t change anything. We all have something we do or something we don’t do (that we wish we did)….you can change it at any time.

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We are now officially in November. There’s two months left of this calendar year. And as I always say, any new month is a good time to set new goals for yourself. And (or) to think about what goals you accomplished last month.

It takes 21 days to start a new habit. So a month provides ample time to begin something new or end a bad habit. We all have a new habit we should start or that would be good for us. And we all have bad habits we should stop. If you need some ideas, consider drinking one extra glass of water a day, eating one extra piece of fruit or a vegetable a day, going for a five minute walk once a day (not if there’s ice on the ground, be smart), doing 10 pushups or 25 (or more) sit ups a day, reading a book a month, contributing to a savings count every week or pay period, even if it’s just $5…the list goes on an on.

But don’t let the passage of time just…pass. You can use any given day, any given moment, to better yourself and to better your life. It just takes a decision to do so and 21 days of diligence and discipline.

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